With The Vegas Pumpin' (was Are You Kidding Me?)

When I was about thirteen years old, my brother and I went through a "guess what" phase with my mother while she was at school. We did all sorts of stupid shit: piercings, various pyromaniac activities, motorcycle joy-riding, smoking anything that didn't smoke us, etc. When she called to check in on us, we would undoubtedly be home like the cherubic children that we were, and ask her to "guess what." Then we would confess to burning something, piercing something or whatever.

One of the pranks that I'm still most proud of (and one that wasn't even fucking noticed for two weeks), was the orange cat with a green mohawk incident. I decided that my (mean) orange cat, Tigger (if he'd been a black tabby, probably would've had another name), would totally look more bad ass with a mohawk. We had clippers because Erich went through that G.I. Joe haircut phase that many little boys go through--I didn't go through that phase until much later--that's a good story. The cat held still, and had as much of a mohawk as a cat could have. He actually seemed to enjoy it (I know that cats don't actually enjoy anything).

Afterwards, I thought that I was going to get in trouble. This wasn't a "guess what" moment. My parents didn't notice Tigger's haircut. When I cut Erich's hair, or my own hair, they did notice. I had to take this Tigger's new style to the extreme (ha--get that--totally not a lifted sample, doggs). I dyed the cat's head with green food coloring--he didn't care for that at all.

They didn't notice until I told my father that I'd done it. Then I think that I was grounded, beaten, or both (most likely).

Getting back to the reason for this post:

In Boulder, pets are not personal property (one cannot own an animal, but rather is its guardian). This is a good reason for the BLC to not play in Boulder--especially since Greg is banned for life (Bunny Genghis) and some of us have a history of animal abuse (just ask Nitwit).

Poodles are neither fowl nor are they rabbits. My perception of this case is just the man trying to generate revenue. It's bullshit, from here:

Ticketed poodle owner vows 'Cici will remain pink'

By Vanessa Miller
Originally published 09:16 a.m., March 11, 2008
Updated 09:16 a.m., March 11, 2008

The Boulder salon owner facing a $1,000 fine for dyeing her miniature poodle pink will have to wait for her day in court.

This morning, Joy Douglas, owner of Zing Salon, 1100 Spruce St., appeared before a judge in Boulder Municipal Court and asked for her hearing to be rescheduled because she's retained a defense attorney.

The judge granted Douglas' request and reset her hearing for April 7.

Officials at the Humane Society of Boulder Valley issued Douglas a ticket on March 1 for violating Section 6-1-14 of Boulder's city code, titled "Dyeing fowl and rabbits prohibited."

Douglas has insisted she didn't break that law, because she uses beet juice — and occasionally Kool-Aid — to "stain" her dog Cici's coat. She said she never has used chemicals, and her pooch never has had a reaction to the stain.

This morning, Douglas brought Cici to court, but had to leave the pink poodle outside the Boulder County Justice Center.

Douglas remained confident that she ultimately will be vindicated and won't be fined for having colored Cici's coat.

"Cici will be pink until they kick us out of the city of Boulder," Douglas vowed before her brief hearing.

She also reiterated her claim that she dyed the dog pink to support breast cancer awareness.

"This is a good opportunity to talk about people's rights and breast cancer," Douglas said. "There's always lemonade and lemons."

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